Official Declaration: This WILL Be My Last Pregnancy


I’m making it official. If I have any say in it, I will never, ever (evereverevereverever) get pregnant again.

I love babies and kids. I’d take 4 (or 5 or 10) of them. But I can’t handle being pregnant. And so I’m making it official: This is my last pregnancy.

That means a year from now when I start feeling all nostalgic about baby booties and baby coos, you’ll remind me.

And two years from now when my baby is walking and talking and I start whining about how my kids are all grown up and my babies aren’t babies anymore, you’ll remind me.

And five years from now when my baby starts kindergarten and I leave the room sobbing because my baby is officially a big boy, you’ll remind me.

No more babies. No more pregnancies.

Question for you: How many kids do you have? How many do you want? If you’re done, how did you know you were done?

31 Comments

  1. You crack me up, Erin. But I totally hear you! I wanted 3 kids and I had 3 kids. I would gladly have adopted one or two more, but my hubby wasn't on board with that idea.

    I knew I was done when I didn't sleep for 3 months after the birth of my third child. After two easy-going boy babies, my much prayed-for girl who never stopped crying and never wanted to be put down just about pushed me over the edge. Plus, my body just didn't handle my pregnancies well. Lots of trauma and complications, etc.

    SO glad I'm done. :)

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  2. I'm so with you. My pregnancies are not as difficult as yours, but plenty difficult enough. Next time I get "baby germs," I think we'll get a puppy. Then if I NEED a girl eventually (I have two boys), we'll look into adoption.
    Lindsay
    (my mom, Anne, is friends with your mom)

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  3. LOL, You sound just like me! I have 2 children and I want more, but they are NOT coming out of my body. My previous deliveries were complicated, and God made it pretty clear I'm done. But I'll happily adopt the next one or two children to complete my family. :)

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  4. We have 3, and we're done unless God leads us to adopt (which I'm hoping he does).

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  5. I have two boys, and while I love the idea of trying for a girl, I am just NOT mentally there (probably because my youngest, who's 3, still gets up at all hours of the night LIKE A NEWBORN!). And stories like Julie's up there don't do anything to fan the flame, that's for sure! 😉

    I wonder how many babies we would have if it really was as simple as a stork?!

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  6. I want 2 kids… I think. The problem is going to be if we have two kids of the same gender… then, we may want to try for a third. But as of now, I think 2 kids. :)

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  7. I want two kids right now, though three is the family number. lol. No plans for the immediate future yet!

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  8. I wanted two and had two. I just knew I didn't have the physical, spiritual, emotional bandwidth for more than that. I do get nostalgic sometimes when I see little ones, especially since this fall my "baby" will be getting on that dreaded kindergarten bus. At the same time, all of the stages are wonderful, and I love being "mobile" with the family now where we can do things together. Plus I get a lot more sleep – lol!

    For me the decision was always easy, but I know many people who struggle/are struggling with it. I feel fortunate that this was one decision I was firm on from the beginning and don't regret.

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  9. We knew we wanted 4 kids from the start. I have a step-daughter who is 15 and that meant my husband & I would have 3 kids. My husband is an only child and I had just one sister so we knew we both wanted a "larger" family but not more than we could financially take care of in a responsible way so we chose to have 4 kids. We now have kids ages 15, 9, 7 & 5.

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  10. How is the situation with your child's nightmares? Better I hope.

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  11. I wanted four, had trouble getting one, haven't been blessed with any more… and am grateful!

    Turns out I don't have the wherewithall for pregnancy either. My body does not cope well.

    Will God bring us another child, naturally or via stork? Who knows… but I say rest in Him – if it's not meant to be, there's no point angsting over it.

    And if it is meant to be, He'll get us through. Right?

    *Sigh*

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  12. Thanks for your comment on my blog today, Erin. I just popped over to see what you've been saying here. I am SO not 32 anymore (my youngest is older than you, with two little ones of her own), but your words bring back lots of memories. I had two miscarriages and two children, then, after five years went by and we'd always said we'd like "two or three", we had to decide if we would keep trying for the third or adopt. Well, we adopted… and as the paperwork was being processed, I became pregnant! The "two or three" became four. My successful pregnancies were those easy kind that you don't want to hear about, but all the deliveries were C-sections, and in the end stopping at four was a decision the doctors made for me. However many and however they come, babies are a precious gift and an awesome responsibility. I'll bet your book is full of motherhood gems. Best of luck with it.

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  13. lol! I had five! I had four boys and the last one out is a girl. One of the boys didn't make it, but the other three are more than thriving. I thought after my last boy I would quit but I really wanted one more and for it to be a girl. The Lord was so kind! I think when your pregnant isn't the best time to make this decision. 😉 But honestly that ache never really goes away and you're right, kids are a TON of work.

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  14. I had two and I kinda wanted three but I kept putting it off and putting it off because I guess I just didn't want three badly enough. Eventually I just knew I was done.

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  15. I don't blame you! You have been thru so much with your pregnancies; I don't know if I would have had multiples if I had to go thru what you did. 3 is a great number. I think we will stop at 3. However, if we have 3 boys, we might try and adopt a girl. :) But, whatever God has planned for us!

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  16. I stopped at 2, and I had fairly trouble-free pregnancies. My sis-in-law, however, had two kids and threw up all during the pregnancies–not just the first 3 months. Ugh!

    Anyway, I love the 2 girls I had, but decided 2 was enough even tho I'd originally targeted for 3 & always wanted a little boy. I wanted to have enough energy to care for them–plus, Kids Are Expensive! The world has a lot of people in it already, and adding 2 more to it seemed enough. Also, a family of four splits pies and cakes evenly, fits in the car well, and on conference/choir days if there's a conflict, one parent can go with each child. Perfect!

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  17. Wow, girl. How do you get so many comments in only a few hours???

    We have four. The 4th pregnancy was 'my last.' But my heart is still waiting for the next two to show up on my doorstep.

    Our last name is Beers. So with four children we can be called the SixPack. With six children, we can be called the same. Not so much with five children. God needs to bring two to my doorstep. I'm not getting pregnant again…my husband's 'snip snip' almost guarantees it. :)

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  18. We have two, and I'm good with that. I feel open to the possibility of more, but sometimes we can barely handle what we've got. So we'll play it by ear.

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  19. We wanted 2 or 3, and I'm pregnant with our 3rd, so we're definitely done!

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  20. My husband and I decided we were finished having babies before we even started. We've always felt like we should be foster parents instead. It's strange, though — I feel like I should feel like I'm missing out on all the pregnancy stuff, but I don't. Every time someone announces a pregnancy, I offer congratulations, but inside I'm thinking, I will not be envying what you'll be going through for the next nine months!

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  21. Well… we haven't even had one yet, and we for sure haven't made a solid number decision. Regardless we definitely want to leave room for the Lord's will in something that huge. (I do joke around with my favorite number though… but since my favorite number is seventeen and a half I think I can safely rule it out.)

    However as someone whose family has been very blessed by adoption I would encourage you if you still want to have more kids but not another pregnancy to pray about that.

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  22. I stopped at one. What a wimp, right? Had trouble getting pregnant, staying pregnant and horrid delivery. Husband could have the next one but he declined. Now that I'm older, I wish I had gone for number two no matter what. My daughter hates being an only child.

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  23. I always wanted two, and that's what the good Lord gave me! I feel very blessed!

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  24. I'm proud of you for posting this publicly. I feel like I remember a similar sentiment after Kate was born. Now maybe you'll have an easier time remembering :)

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  25. Oh Boy. I said the same thing when I was pregnant with #2. My husband even got me on video saying that I would never get pregnant again.

    Then, #3 was just too tempting. I'd even take 4 or 5!

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  26. I really didn't have a set number -But, I like the way it's turned out for me -having 2; a boy and a girl -I just know I didn't want to be like my MIL she had 7 kids -eek -I couldn't even imagine!

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  27. Eh — I have five, with a miscarriage on #6. I knew it was time to stop when God stopped sending'em!

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  28. I had three, I knew at two, but number three came as a blessing. I am so glad she did!

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  29. I have two young ones and wanted four total! But, like you, pregnancy is hard on me (migraines, tiredness, etc.), so I knew I couldn't take care of the two I have while being pregnant with number three. So I think we're done!

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  30. Hi, I just found your blog. I have 2 kids, 4 and 17 months, girl and boy. I'm pretty sure I'm done, but then who am I to decide that? That's up to God. We certainly aren't planning to try and actively conceive any more babies any time soon but who know? I loved being pregnant. It's actually the mama thing I find challenging. I am the most disorganised person and I'm really not good at being a wife or mama. Must do better!

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  31. I have two kids, 2 and 9 months, and feel that "someone else" is still missing. My husband thinks two people are still missing, but that's something we'll just have to discuss in the future.

    Don't hate me, but I LOVE being pregnant. Even when I'm ready to pop I think it's fantastic. The day I brought my 9-month-old home from the hospital I announced, "I can't wait to be pregnant again!" I know that is not the norm and so I'm very grateful for it. Now if there was just a way for me to be pregnant about 10 more times without having to deal with 10 more babies I would do it. (And yes, I asked my husband if I could be a surrogate and the answer was an emphatic "no!") :)

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