A few years ago, I had hired a babysitter so I could go Christmas shopping without kids tugging at my sweater begging for cocoa while I shopped.  And it was nice and peaceful, but after a few hours, I realized that Christmas planning was stealing me away from Christmas with my family.  I had sent my kids off with my husband so I could decorate the house in peace.  And I had hired a babysitter so I could go to the Christmas tree lighting in peace.  And I had sent my kids to my mom’s house so I could do some baking in peace.  And all that peace brought me a lot of quiet and very little time with my family.

Don’t get me wrong: I’ll almost certainly hire a babysitter to help me while I shop this year (shopping with a one-year-old is a nightmare as you moms of toddlers can certainly attest), I’m also going to make sure I reserve time every day during the holidays to just be with my family and even more, I’m letting my six-year-old and my five-year-old help with the baking, the decorating and the shopping.  I know there’s a good chance my decorations won’t be Pottery Barn perfect and my Christmas cookies won’t be elegantly decorated, but I also know that the time spent together will be cherished.  By all of us.

I think a lot of the reason that Christmas tends to turn into a consumer-driven mess for so many of us is that so many of our Christmas traditions are centered around gifts, gifts, gifts.  And so this year, I’ve made it my goal to really focus on some of our family’s fun (and not gift-related) traditions.

For example, several years ago, my church community group started an Advent tradition.  Every Sunday night between Thanksgiving and Christmas, we gather our families together in one of our houses to celebrate Advent.  The host family usually has a hot pot of soup in the Crockpot and we share a simple meal and then a couple of guys bust out their guitars and we all sing Christmas carols together.  We finish the evening by reading a part of the Christmas story together.  It’s a tradition that even my young kids enjoy and something that brings our whole family (and group of friends) closer to the true meaning of the season.

There are so many fun ways to get into the holiday spirit without spending a fortune or getting wrapped up in materialistic pursuits.  And by focusing on these fun family traditions, kids start to see that Christmas is a whole lot more than Santa and presents.  Here are a few ideas:

-       Volunteer to serve meals at a homeless shelter.  Dress in your best Christmas sweaters and show your kids the joy of serving.

-       Stroll around your neighborhood—or if it’s too cold, drive—and look at the lights.

-       Decorate from the great outdoors.  Even if you live in the city like I do, use boughs off of your Christmas tree or leaves from outside to help you decorate.  Last year, we even found a ball of mistletoe growing on a tree in our yard and brought it inside.

-       Every night (or some nights) after dinner, light a fire, put on pajamas and snuggle on the couch together and read a Christmas book or a part of the Christmas story from the bible.  Make hot cocoa or eggnog if you don’t mind your kids going to bed hopped up on sugar.  Or serve herbal tea if you do mind.

-       Skip store bought Christmas cards and work together to make them as a family.  Sure, the coloring may not be perfect (and you may end up with glitter all over the floor) but they’ll be so much more personal than anything you could buy.

-       Bake loaves of cranberry bread or cinnamon muffins and deliver them to your neighbors.

My friend Rachel said something to me a last year that really resonated:  “Don’t look for the best deals for you, but instead, the best deals for everyone.”  So, yes, scoring a supercute dress for your daughter for $9.99 may be a good deal for you, but before you buy, think about who is getting hurt by your purchases.  Is there a child in China who had to stitch that dress together for hours on end making pennies per hour?  Or was the cotton harvested by slave labor?

Sadly many popular and thriving American companies sell products that hurt people—especially children—in other parts of the world.  And while it’s easy to push the problem out of our minds as something that is too big for us to solve, I want to remind you that as Christians and citizens of the world, it’s our call to make sure that the orphans, the widows, the poor and the immigrants are treated fairly. I know I can’t change the poverty, slavery and disparity in this world singlehandedly, but I can certainly buy products that were made by people who were paid a fair wage.  And who were working in fair conditions.

And so, this Christmas, I’m going to buy gifts that I know come from companies that utilize fair practices.  There are hundreds of companies that do exactly that—Google “fair trade products” or you can also find a comprehensive list at www.toactjustly.com/shopping.  And while it may cost me a little more, I know that shopping fair trade makes sure that I’m getting a great deal for everyone involved.